I am worthy of this space I repeated over and over in my mind today whilst moving around the beach in a bikini. I am worthy of taking up my spot on the sand regardless of the well-known terrified voice in my head – the voice that spits through gritted teeth ‘people are going to SEE you…see your enormous dimpled thighs and skin that wobbles’.
My new voice calmly, but sternly said, Let. Them. See.
I will no longer be held ransom by my inner mean girl. My sassy gal tossed off her towel, took a deep breath and walked strongly into the water toward my gorgeous young daughters who haven’t yet created their own internal damning whispers. They simply know their bodies through glorified skun knees and bike-stack bruises…not questioning whether they are ‘good enough’ to wear a bikini.
I will keep showing up and wearing clothes that make me feel beautiful and comfortable even with my extra curves on show. I am worthy of the space in which I stand. It has taken me many moons of personal reflection to get me to this place and it is life-long work. I do it for my beautiful children. I also do it for any woman who second guesses living a vibrant life because her inner critic says she shouldn’t be seen. Whether you are larger or smaller than me, no doubt you are familiar with your own internal slanders. Always remember that you are worthy. You are good enough.
Along with beautifully exfoliated sand kissed feet, salty eyelashes and a massive grin on my face I also came away from the beach with a splendid shell. It is cracked and tumbled but I love it as it’s ‘perfectly imperfect’. So today was anything but imperfect…it was a stunning diamond day with my gorgeous family. Here’s to showing up and knowing you are worthy!
I am Ailsa Robson, a Psychotherapist and Author.
Self-reflection helps me to change my life
I make sense of my world through self-reflection.
I open up my mind, unpack and scrutinise my thoughts then write about them. It’s been a cathartic tool for me for decades. Often it pours from my soul, flooding my mind until I can release the flow of words onto a page. This helps me to see how my thoughts become my truth and why it’s imperative to pay attention to them, honouring each one but inviting the more helpful thoughts to grow stronger.
That day at the beach I knew I was changing my life story. I owned my space, my right to be the perfectly imperfect woman that I am without shame and without apology. I created a new normal for myself.
Life beyond dieting
My stories of imperfection have often centred around my body. In the past I was a typical yo-yo dieter, focussed on losing weight. I used to believe that I had failed the diets I had endured, now I realise that the diets actually failed me. I educated myself further, and now practice Health At Every Size® principles that focus on well-being rather than weight loss.
I actively move my body because it brings me joy and assists my mental and physical health. I no longer follow any restrictive diets, instead I eat intuitively and find joy in adding foods that make me feel well, leaving less room for foods that don’t. I also find joy in regularly practicing acts of self-care and I weave compassion and gratitude into each day.
So many women are tired of loathing themselves and simply wish to like themselves more.
Often we feel our life isn’t quite where we imagined it would be. We doubt ourselves and doubt if we will ever be ‘good enough’ in one way or another.
We are all Perfectly Imperfect
I want you to know that you are not alone. We are all flawed and that’s ok. I want you to know that you are worthy of love, respect, kindness, joy and peace within yourself regardless of how your life may be panning out, and that you are good enough, exactly as you are.
This is my passion and it is the passion for many other compassionate folk in the world.
People are starting to accept themselves flaws and all. The idea that you aren’t good enough unless you are a particular weight, have an adoring partner, have a perfect family, and live a perfect lifestyle is being challenged.
Women are starting to realise that we all live our own versions of imperfect lives and that’s ok.
Differences are beginning to be celebrated
Take note of body diversity all around you, choose to follow body positive warriors in your socials, and surround yourself with diverse voices that raise you up and make you feel encouraged.
Remember every day that you are so much more than just your body #morethanmybody
The world is crying out for diverse women warriors – some of them dimpled, wobbly, stretched and scarred warriors.
Do you dream of taking your place next to me and others who are no longer apologetic for their flaws?
Then. Let. Us. See. You.
Line up with me, on the sand, bestowed with sun-cream as war paint and a twinkle in your eye.
Wear that bikini, pair of shorts, sleeveless top, or anything else that you’ve been dreaming of wearing and stride around confidently.
There is nothing, and no one stopping you.
You are worthy. You are good enough.
Image credit: Canva Natural Women Collection