In the world of Tinder, online dating and Ashley Maddison – where cheating appears to be a way of life - I want to ask you the question, do you believe in love?

Do you think that true love isn’t possible, doesn’t last or is simply a Hollywood myth?

Are you surrounded by stories that enforce this point of view?

Do you regularly read glossy magazines or online articles where even celebrities can’t stay together?

Your friends’ relationships haven’t worked and you may have experienced a bad break up yourself. You hear your friends talk about their relationship issues and think to yourself, why would anyone want that!

Do you realise you are surrounding yourself with messages and images that love doesn’t work? If this is you, then you shouldn’t be mystified by your ongoing single status!

I want to tell you that thinking thoughts that love doesn’t work and looking for an awesome relationship is the equivalent of eating fast food 24/7 and thinking you will lose weight!

How can you change this?

If you change your thoughts about love, you can literally change your life. You can replace your belief that love isn’t possible, with the belief that you **will** find the love you have always dreamt of!

Did you know that if you Google the benefits of being in love you will get 416,000,000 results! That is a lot of zero’s and literally millions of benefits from being in love.

There are endless songs written about love. The Beatles sang ‘All you need is Love’ and they were right! People are made to have a deep connection with others and when you build great relationships, the rewards are endless. You’re created to be social and connected to others, and when that need isn’t fulfilled, it can put stress on your body.

So a strong love connection can literally work wonders.

Love is amazing and it is proven to make you happier, healthier and wealthier.

So we have established the benefits of love, now what?

Well I recommend looking at the way you think about love! I want to start by asking you what you think about this statement: ‘How I think affects how I act’. Do you think your thoughts and words matter?

If you answered yes, you are right - they do. Our thoughts end up becoming our beliefs.

How? A belief is a thought that you listen to over and over again. You listen to the thought so often that you think it is true – a fact. Some beliefs serve us and some don’t.

Do you know what your beliefs are? To find out look at the statements you make. Here are a few examples – ‘There are no good men out there’; ‘love doesn’t work’; ‘life isn’t fair’ and ‘I'm not good enough’. If you say a statement often enough and listen to it over and over again; it will become a belief – a very limiting one.

To attract what you are looking for, you need to identify your beliefs and look at the ones that hold you back. You can then change them by replacing them with a new non limiting belief.

‘Let’s look at the love example– ‘Love doesn’t work’ and replace it with ‘Love works and is meant for me’.

Stop giving the old belief – ‘love doesn’t work’ any thought or energy and give the new thought ‘love works and is meant for me’ thought and energy. Think of the new thought over and over again, say it out loud, write it down, and tell people. BAM you have created a life changing belief.

If you want a new experience in dating/love you can get it by changing your thoughts and ultimately your beliefs. The new beliefs will create different actions and ultimately different results.

Have you ever noticed when you buy a new car – you start to see that car EVERYWHERE. Or if you start looking for people who are wearing red – you will notice red all the time. The same applies to the new belief, when you start to look for love, you will see examples of it everywhere!

Now as you are starting to see these examples everywhere, the next step is to surround yourself with examples of love working and happy couples. When I started to do this I was surprised at how many wonderful love stories there are, out there.

I also recommend something quite corny – read love stories, watch soppy love movies, listen to positive love songs. Literally immerse your life in examples of love working.

Also, I would recommend that you get rid of anything in your life that may re-enforce the idea that love doesn’t work. Have a good look at your living and work spaces to see if there is anything that has a negative view of love. Books, magazines, pictures, even stuff that reminds you of an ex – get rid of it! Stop reading stories of break ups and listening to sad songs about love doing you wrong or not working.

Finally, when you remove your attention from love not working and start to focus on love, you invite it into your life.

Love doesn’t have to be a faraway place meant for other people!

Founder at |

Debbie Rivers, Dare2Date's founder, has been trained by the Matchmakers Institute in New York. She is a certified Match Maker and a trained Life Coach with the Life Coaching Institute.
In addition, Debbie is also a certified practitioner in Coaching and NLP. She blogs about dating and life and is a sought-after media commentator on all things relationships and dating.
Debbie has used her own experience of being single in Perth, Western Australia and discovering a lack of opportunities for meeting genuine singles to build Dare2Date. Dare2Date was founded in 2011 and has grown from offering speed dating to a range of events and services for Perth guys and girls looking for love and fun.