Attraction 101

by Samantha Jayne | Oct 4, 2013 | Dating, Editor's Pick, Love

What matters most to men when it comes to attraction?

What makes a woman desirable to a man? What makes a man give a woman a second, lingering look? What interests a man to ask a woman out? Is it her beautiful face? Is an hourglass-shaped body a dead giveaway of a woman’s level of attractiveness? Is it the way her scent captivates men’s attention? Is it the look in her eyes that seemingly say come-hither? Is it the air of confidence and independence about her that lures men in? Is it the sound of her laughter? Or is there a surprising secret on how to attract men that most women haven’t been privy to?

If women knew the one thing about them that would surely attract members of the opposite sex, then single-hood would be such a myth. If there’s one quick formula to draw a man’s attention, then the world would be teeming with couples.

However, if you ask ten random men on what matters most to them when it comes to attraction, they’d give you varying answers from the downright serious to the incredulous. Attraction itself is defined as an invisible force that has the power to bring forth a response. It has also been equated to personal charm.

If so, is charm all there is when it comes to attracting men?

Physical Attraction. We use our sense of sight plenty. And when men ‘see’ a woman for the first time, they ‘check them out’. What do they see that they like? Research and studies that were conducted to determine which physical qualities men find most attractive don’t always have the same results. Sure, we’d all like to look at a beautiful face, but it's the body that most men are drawn to. Naturally, if checking out a woman was done head to toe, men looked more often at the breast size of women. In fact, the study by Barnaby Dixson, a New Zealand anthropologist, revealed that a woman’s cleavage attracts the most attention and that the “breasts and waist received more first looks than the face or lower body”. This finding may not hold true to other cultures and other societies though.

Beauty is beyond skin deep still. Most men would define a woman beautiful if she takes time to take care of herself and make an effort to at least look good and even puts a little thought into how others, including men, perceive her. Somewhere women have to draw the line between laid-back and sloppy, and polished and presentable.

Personality Traits. Although it’s true that physique is what lures men in at first, it is the personality that makes them stay. It’s like being attracted to a good book cover, but it’s the story inside that makes you stay. Cliché yes, but definitely true.

Medieval men may have shared the penchant to fall for damsels in distress, but there’s a reason they’re called medieval— because it’s obsolete these days. Men go after women who can take care of themselves and hold their own; someone whose world doesn’t revolve around men alone and someone who is passionate about their own thing. Ambition and independence are also surefire qualities that attract men. However, a woman can be all-independent but still keep her femininity. That includes being affectionate and supportive to her man as well. It wouldn’t hurt if a woman was spontaneous and has a sense of humor (although that may mean that she laughs at ALL of his jokes instead of the other way around).

The general rule of attraction for both sexes still remain though— “You attract what you put out there”.

By Samantha Jayne

By Samantha Jayne

Samantha Jayne is a Relationship Expert, Dating Coach, Matchmaker, Author, Speaker and founder of Samantha Jayne. Samantha is THE expert in rescuing professional singles looking for love. With Blue Label Life’s incredible 92% success rate in establishing long term relationships. She is also founder of Make Men Commit, a website for women to bring out their inner goddess within and snare the man of their dreams! Samantha brings a fresh and honest approach to the world of dating advice, “When it comes to Love, be open, positive and expect the unexpected”. Pick up your copy of Samantha's e-book How to Make a Man Commit: Your ultimate guide to capturing the man of your dreams AND keeping him" today.

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