3 Steps to Turn Vulnerability to Strength
To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength. – Criss Jami
The first step is AWARENESS.
We all have an awesome, inbuilt guidance system, which whispers wisdom from our souls, but many of us have forgotten how or gotten out of the habit of listening. More than that, we live in a society that glorifies and idolises optimism, or feelings of joy and promotes comparison. The kind of comparison that has us comparing a fish to a bicycle and wondering why we feel different.
Which leaves us feeling vulnerable.
Instead of teaching us that all feelings are equal and moveable and passing – we have been taught that some are less desirable and unwanted. These less desirable feelings like shame, anger, resentment, sadness or vulnerability have become the enemy – so we numb them out. We numb them with food, or alcohol, sex, work or TV – whatever your drug of choice, I know you have one.
The thing is that our feelings, including vulnerability, are our inner guidance – our hearts and our true selves telling us who we are and what is right for us. The feelings of vulnerability we have are in fact invitations for us to go inside and listen to our own internal wisdom.
[Tweet “When we experience vulnerability we are in fact in tune with and noticing our inner guidance system.”]
The trick is to listen.
To become more aware and not to make the feelings less controlling or less dominant, but to reframe them not as BAD feelings, but wise, alerts.
I like to think of anger and sadness and shame and feelings of vulnerability as shadow deities; beautiful dark goddesses of the feeling realm, inviting me to go inside and listen for their wisdom.
So, how do you turn vulnerability to strength?
Listen to it, underneath the helplessness or fear is a whisper of truth talking to you.
The second step is TRUST.
Once you trust yourself and your feelings you will be acting from a place that is authentic and real. A place that resonates with people because it is your hearts message.
People will hear you on the level from which you connect with them. When you connect with your heart and trust what it has to say then speak and act from your truth – it will have a profound effect – a rippling butterfly effect.
The truth is that life is one huge oxymoron. The truth is that it is indeed through your vulnerability that you find your strength.
The third step is PRACTICE.
Like building anything you must repeat the exercise until you become competent and confident in it.
So start small, learning to trust yourself takes time and patience. Try not to set yourself up – pick good people to share your vulnerabilities and your heart with. Slowly you will gain momentum and find that as you trust yourself more you will trust others more and then one day you’ll find you are speaking to or acting with the bus driver or a stranger with the same heart and vulnerable realness as you would your bestie.
with love and light, on purpose with purpose
Ebonie
About the author
Ebonie Allard is The Entrepreneur Enabler.
She is a certified Coach, a Creative Consultant, an Adventurer, a Yogini, and a Tattooed Badass Chick. At her core she believes that it is our responsibility to shine, to bring our gifts to the world, and to encourage others to do the same.
Through 1-2-1, face to face, small group & online coaching as well as specialist retreats she Enables and Empower Freelancers, Business Owners and Entrepreneurs to:
- Accelerate Adventure; building purposeful, fun, fulfilled and rewarding lives.
- Catalyse Connection; creating a sense of real belonging, leading to awesome relationships both with yourselves and with others.
- Magnetize money; in a way that feels good and is in line with your values.
It is her mission to help you live a fully rounded three dimensional, successful and self-governed life.