I was sitting here thinking about what I was going to write for the money issue this month.
My husband has the hockey game on in the background and a commercial comes on. It was a hockey player and he was talking about how his measure of success isn’t based on his success with the team, but rather how he feels about himself and how his children look up to him.
I can honestly say that that is the best advice I have heard in a long time.
I am constantly making excuses for the size of my house, the size of my mid-sized SUV, the reason we eat where we eat and shop where we shop. I am constantly comparing myself to others and their successes rather than remembering where I came from and everything I/we as a couple have accomplished.
I am a firefighter, my husband is a cop, we are blue collar government workers and we are very middle class. We live paycheck to paycheck and watch and budget what we spend each month. This is very different than our own family members and some of our friends/neighbors.
We have a two-year-old, and one on the way. I can honestly say I have accepted any and all handouts from friends offering clothes, shoes, toys, books, etc. as well as give back when we have outgrown our own stuff.
I guess my point is, we live well within our means, we are frugal to an extent, and were probably more the norm than we know. I have been trying to get better about being proud of what we do own, where we do live and drive, and how hard we have worked to be here. Also, if we would have looked at our lives five years ago, and compare it to where we are today, we are exactly where we wanted to be and then some!
I need to remember that success isn’t graded by material objects, money or your job, but rather how happy you are, your interaction with your family and those relationships you have built with peers, friends, and family, and how you treat people daily.
Money is obviously a tangible way of defining success, and of course does make people happy because they can buy things they want and need.
I am definitely guilty of wanting more of it, and working as hard as I can to have the most of it… but it doesn’t define me. It does not make me happy, or a good wife, a good mother, good employee, or friend. That is all based on my character, my values, morals and how I am viewed as a person.
I sure do love having money and the more the merrier, but what I value even more is my self-worth, my pride, dignity, honor and desire. I feel I have more passion and drive than most and the things that drive me to succeed aren’t necessarily measured monetarily but more how I feel about myself at the end of the day and if I have lived up to my full potential daily and weekly.
If I was my spouse, would I be proud to call me my wife.