How often do you have sex? Is it less than you did when you were 21?
As we juggle kids, jobs and our social lives one of the first things that we seem to sacrifice is sex. It’s not just sex either, being affectionate towards your partner may have been downplayed in front of the kids which then turned into the norm. Affection brings you closer to your partner both physically and emotionally so when the affection disappears in a relationship, other aspects may follow.
For many couples one of the top reasons for dwindling affection is because the kids are around. Once a fortnight try to organise them to sleepover at a friend’s house or to get a babysitter to look after them. This means that you can go out with your partner for a date! Try a romantic dinner where you can talk to each other freely without the kids nearby. If you have the house to yourselves you could open a bottle of wine, light some candles and treat your partner to a special home-cooked meal; this also means that the bedroom is right down the hall!
Small surprises go a long way. It shows your partner that you were thinking about them during the day and they can be bought on the way back home or whilst you do the groceries. A box of chocolates, a bottle of wine or even a bunch of flowers “just because” will make your partner feel special. Another way to show that you have been thinking about them is sending them affectionate and sexy texts telling them what you’re going to do to them when they get home. A quick: ‘I can’t wait until you walk in the door tonight so I can rip off your clothes, throw you on the couch and lick/suck/squeeze every part of you’ will get them in the mood (and unable to concentrate on their weekly finance reports)!
Just because you’re juggling a busy lifestyle doesn’t mean that you stop touching your partner.
One of the simplest ways to show affection is to give your partner a kiss hello rather than just verbalising it. Hold hands when you are walking down the street. Join him in the shower. Or if the kids are in the lounge watching TV and you’re in the kitchen, kiss him, rub up against him, give him a quick squeeze and leaving him wanting more for when the kids are in bed!
The simplest gestures of affection can help all aspects of your relationship, so just remember that a simple kiss hello or organising a date night is all you need to do whilst juggling a busy life.